The here and now

Picture this: you're sitting there, at a nice dinner, friends around you, the conversation is great, you're in the middle of an exciting story and all the sudden the silence is broken by a high pitched, electronically enhanced jingle. Your friend breaks contact immediately, pouncing at her phone (it's on the table of course! No way she'd leave it in her purse!). She reaches for her phone in complete panic mode, not to carefully touch the decline or silence button. Oh no! It's to punch her index finger at her phone in a frantic attempt to answer that all important phone call. And really it doesn't matter who's on the other end. I've seen friends walk away from a very deep, touching convo for a blocked number- or an unknown. The only thing that matters is that it's ringing! And not only will they pounce at their phone/ they'll pounce at yours!

I'm not very quick to answer my phone. I check it periodically but I don't jump everytime it rings. If my child is telling me a story, it can wait. If I've got flour all over my hands in the midst of preparing dinner, it can wait. If I'm unloading laundry, it can wait. If I'm having a conversation with the yard guy, it can wait. I just don't jump at my phone- which is apparently very disturbing to some people. My friends will stare at me as if I'm an alien invader & they just can't figure out what unearthly being would not stop mid sentence to answer the 5x3 all powerful box. But to me, who would love to live in 1957 America- this idea of dismissing your current situation to engage in a conversation over the phone is just crazy. 

On the flip side I LOVE texting. Modern technology is so cool. If I'm busy & you text me, then later when I'm free of conversation or not engaged in human interaction I can check my phone, then I can respond & all is right again in the universe.

 I have a friend, Danielle, who I seriously consider a best friend. She & I will go weeks without communication. Then, I'll text her because she's on my mind, or I have a question, or I just wanna/ and I know that it may be a few days before I hear from her- & I love it. Because I know that while she's not responding to me- she's playing with one of her 3 beautiful girls, or painting a masterpiece, or editing some of her fabulous photography. She's living in the moment- & I don't for a second hold it against her. 

So I beg of you, the next time you call or text me try to remember this: I may not answer. Because I may very well be playing ball with my boys, or reading an exciting book, or chatting with a dear friend, or cuddling with my husband, or perfecting a yoga pose, basically just living in that very moment. And you have to know that I love you/ It's not that I don't have time for you/ but I'm choosing not to jump at my phone every time it buzzes, or beeps, or chirps, or does that weird shaky thing. I am choosing to embrace the here & now.